:: 気持ち最大悪いAries Part 5 ::

Insert: Get the Future (by Takahashi Hitomi)

This world has no justice.
Since the day I grew up in this family, I understood this concept of life.

My family treat me like a fool, although I really WAS a fool.
But now I’m an adult.
Can’t they treat me better?

I admit. I’m wrong.
I admit. I’m noisy.
I admit. I’m inconsiderate.
But does that means that you are not?
Does that means that you can just defy my actions?
Does that means that you understood my actions?
Does that means that you have the right to critisize my actions?

When you are actually messing up my place just for your selfishness?
When you are actually ORDERING me to do stuffs for your playfulness?
When you are actually the one that’s WRONG?!

And my brain is none for your insultments.
I have absolutely nothing in intelligence for you to insult.
I am a little slow, yes, but that does not means that I do not know what to do.

So can you please SHUT UP and let me do what I want?

I already tell you I want to leave this house.
I already tell you I can be on my own.
But you insisted to want me be in this house.
But you insisted that I couldn’t take care of myself.

And now you’re telling me I’m noisy?
While you already knew what will happen if you insisted that I’m going to stay here?
And now you’re critisizing me how to take care of myself?
While you never even let me do it?



It was just a game, alright?
Mah-Jong, to be exact.
I know how to play, from the start.
Is just that YOU are the one that ASSUMED that I do not know a single thing.
So I proved that I know the general knowledge.
And what the heck, you praise me as if I’ve got a prize.
It’s just a general knowledge, dude!!
How can it be so hard???

Am I really that brainless in your mind?

But you know what, to me, you are the brainless one.

I’m just playing, training my brain.
You’re there telling me, what to throw and what to eat.
AS IF I REALLY DON’T KNOW.
AS IF I REALLY NEED YOUR ASSISTANCE.

So much things that you have done, in just a short one hour length.
You have critisize me at least 2 times in a game.
You have mocked me at least 3 times in a game.
In total, I could not count but, if one game is 5 minutes, you have already…
Critisize me 24 times.
Mocked me 36 times.
In 12 games.

And what’s next?
You’re going to “teach” me.
Hell, I can be a better teacher than you.
I’m just giving you face, okay.
Don’t think I’m really that stupid, would you?

Just that you’re better than I am, doesn’t mean that you can critisize my actions.
Just because you think that I am a fool, doesn’t mean that I am really a fool.
I can be smarter than you.
I can be richer than you.
I can be anything BETTER than you.
If I want to.

You know, you can be such a JERK some times.
If you weren’t my blood-related family, I’ve already wanted to say this phrase in your face.

“Shut the fuck up, would you?!”

And seriously, I’m on the borderline to yell out this phrase.
This exact phrase.
Although I have yelled for millions of times in my heart.
Just to give you some prides you need as my elders.
I respect you.

But what you’ve done had made me losing the respect.
Each step going down the stairs.
I’m starting to hate you.
To dispise you.
To leave you.
To do whatever that opposes you.



Although I oppose the idea of having that baby in my huge room.
But did they listen? No.
I mean, since when they listen to MY OPINION?
They always talked about THEIR OPINION.
And FORCED their opinions on ME.

So what? I’m going out from the room.
What month is that?
About November to December.
What time is that?
My SPM time.
EXACTLY.
So my mom said “Sorry”.
But did that help?
No.
Because I don’t think anyone in the family even felt to say “sorry”.
Because I was so disliked by them.
I don’t care about being disliked.
The world is already unfair anyway.
This is just the beginning.
I know.

What if I’m back to my room?
I’m going to be with the aunty that’s going to take care of the baby.
AND the baby itself.
But I don’t think they WANT me to stay in the room.
Because whatever I do, is no way good for the baby.

So where I’m going to stay then?
In my parents room.
Along with them.

HECK.

You know what?
Sleeping in the living room’s sofa is far much better than staying in THEIR room.
Imagine my dad’s bomb in the night.
Imagine my mom’s nagging UNTIL night.
Can I sleep in there?
I don’t think so.
Can I even study?
I can NEVER think so.

That is why I told them I want to move out.
They do not approve.
So?
I’m going to stay here like Harry Potter?
Sleeping in a storeroom?
Well, he’s far more better than I do.
At least he gets a real home later.
Me?
I have nothing.

I have no foster parents to pass a house to me.
I’m no legendary child.
I’m just another normal child with no power, no money, no pride.
Although how much do I protest, nothing will go my way.
Even the choice where I want to go study music?
Is something they WANT ME to be.
It’s nothing they do not want me to be.
But when I’m going to study music technology?
They oppose.
Saying, “I just want you to be a normal music teacher.”

Hell.
Is that going to happen in me?
Never.
Even if I will, it’ll be decades after this.

And what’s worse?
They want to interfere with my hair.
Telling me to cut on THEIR style.
Heck.
I don’t need their fashion senses.
Theirs are the WORST to come by.
I don’t even want to trust them.
They just force everything on me.



I’m not gonna let you do whatever stuff that you want with my life.
No, and NEVER.

Singapore? I’m going.
And that will be the final destination that you fools can control.
I’m going to break free after that.
I’m going to soar higher in the sky.
I’m going to melt the chains that you have put on me, eternally.
And I shall NEVER come back.

Trust. My. Words. People.